Singapore is where her life ends
Photo credit: Khoo Yee Joo's instagram
In those last hours, in a foreign land, she must have felt lost and helpless.
In those last hours, in a cold and harsh environment, she must have been filled with guilt.
In those last hours, far away from the comfort of her home in Kedah, she must have repeated “I am sorry”, “I love you” to her loved ones one too many times.
According to a person acquainted with the Khoo family, “Joo was under immense pressure that led to depression; her condition deteriorated and [she] took her own life before we could have her seek treatment”.
Photo credit: Khoo Yee Joo's Facebook page
Back in September last year, she was full of hope; Singapore gave her an opportunity for a brighter future.
In her mind, Singapore was the cradle of progress, the starting point from where she can possibly fulfil her many dreams and aspirations.
Four months later, despair and hopelessness had taken up residence in her world. Strong feelings of worthlessness and guilt were now features in her life.
Today, Singapore is where her life ends; it is the site of her death.
From having received an offer to work in Singapore at the end of September last year to her suicide four months later, what had transpired in her life that may have push her over the abyss?
Was she a victim of workplace bullying? Did she face significant issues adjusting to life in a fast-paced city?
We may never know.
She did, however, send out “distress signals” to her elder sister.
Her smiles were beguiling. It gave the people around her a [false] sense of security that all is well with her.
Unbeknownst to us, beneath her smiles were torrents of anguish, torment and a profound sense of vulnerability.
Sadly, there was no light at the end of tunnel for her.
Read her sister's message to her younger sister
In her last moments, she must have felt that her world, which was only so promising just four months prior, was so foreign, so lonely and so hostile.
She would have wish her loved ones well. Today, her loved ones are devastated and broken, and a perpetual sense of guilt will now take root in them.
We must do more to look out for each another, render help and point each other to where we can receive the best possible care and support.
Yee Joo is not an anomaly. As we mourn the passing of a life gone too soon, we must remember that she is not likely the last person to suffer such a tragic end – this itself should give us pause.
Photo credit: Khoo Yee Joo's instagram
Many Malaysians, past and present, who have come to Singapore to seek a better life for themselves and their families, are feeling immense pressure in their lives.
The trauma in them is insidious and invisible – the separation anxieties, the discrimination they may have experienced at their schools or workplaces and the loneliness of their daily grind etc.
In a foreign and harsh land where they are often treated as guests and labour, they can only remind themselves, often in the dead of the night, that everything will be better. That itself is a lie to many, a self-perpetuating fallacy.
Regardless of where we are born, give thanks that our paths had crossed.
Do not judge, and may we, as Singaporeans, reject the all-too-easy and convenient stereotyping and generalising of Malaysians, who, not too long ago, were our brothers and sisters.
Living and working in Singapore is already a chastening enough experience - to Malaysians and Singaporeans alike.
So, please be kind, watch our tongues and judge them not, shall we?
We are all trying to get by, we are simply trying to pay our bills.
At the end of the day, we are all humans. We live, we love and we struggle to make it to the end of each 24-hour cycle.
For Yee Joo, as she arrives on our shores in September last year, a part of her was already very much in grief.
Read Yee Joo's university mate's tribute (english) to her in English
Top photo: Khoo Yee Joo's instagram
